So you’ve decided to test your limits

Remember when you first started having sex, and everything seemed so fresh and exciting? Now that you’re a veteran in the sack, the act of knocking boots might have lost some of its original luster. Switching up partners every now and then is a good way to keep things exciting, but what do you do when your sex begins to feel stale no matter who you’re with? It may be time to switch up your normal bedroom routine, which can be a difficult – but fun! – endeavor. This will likely mean you have to test your own limits a bit, so here are some tips for navigating those murky waters.

Find someone you trust

The first step to exploring new sexual frontiers is to find a partner to help you along your journey. If you have a regular partner, then you probably already know who will be your companion for sampling new sex. But if you’re single, it may be a bit trickier. Find a friend who is experienced and who you feel comfortable around. It helps if you’ve already had sex with this person, so get out your cell phone and comb through those “friends with benefits.” Offer to take your friend out for a drink, and when you find a comfortable way to start talking about sex, let them know you’re eager to try something new. If they’re feeling adventurous as well, then it’s time to invite them back to your place. But if they’re not interested in your new and fresh idea, then don’t push the matter. Instead, head back to the drawing board and either come up with something else to try, or find a different companion who’s a bit more open-minded.

Start slow

If you’ve been having “vanilla sex” for most of your life, then diving head first into a sexual fetish or lifestyle is likely to be overwhelming – and maybe even a little scary. Instead, start slow. Pick something relatively simple, like wearing a blindfold during sex for instance, and work your way up from there. There’s also no shame in practicing something at home, by yourself – if you’re able. For instance, if you are looking to try out some a new vibrating device like the LifeStyles® Vibrating Ring, why not wear it at home the next time you find some time to…ahem…get acquainted with your hand. 

It’s OK to say “No”

Remember, when it comes to sex, the experience should always be enjoyable. If you’re trying out something new that you thought you’d love, but you find it uncomfortable, painful or icky, then you should feel 100 percent comfortable pulling the plug. Don’t feel bad about changing your mind – after all, this is a sexual experiment, and not all experiments are a success on the first try.

This rule applies to your partner as well. If you’ve discussed what you’d like to do with your lover, but he or she finds that mid-romp it’s getting to be too much, you must respect his or her needs and wrap things up. This doesn’t mean you have to end the encounter entirely. Instead, put the new idea you’ve had on hold, and return to the tried and true, albeit less wild sex you’ve been having.

What should never change

Of course, there are some things about sex that you absolutely should not experiment with. In particular, you should always practice safe sex, even when you’re experimenting in other ways. Sexually transmitted infections are a surefire way to make a new sexual escapade anything but enjoyable, so always play it safe.

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