Guys and girls don’t always have the same desires when it comes to sex and they certainly don’t have the same kind of sexual clock. When one partner feels like it’s time to knock boots, another could completely disagree. The trick is to find a balance that satisfies both people.
One man recently highlighted this issue with a question to The Boulder Weekly. He explained that his wife seemed to only get in the mood after one or two drinks and he wanted to know if there was any way he could help her feel ready for the bedroom without the influence of alcohol.
Dr. Jenni Skyler replied that “Many people prefer sex during altered states of body and mind because it loosens inhibitions, provoking heightened arousal. However, if this is the only time your wife becomes sexually interested, then further exploration is needed.”
She added that everyone is programmed differently and women often have lower sex drives than men. However, there could be psychological or physical issues at work as well. The trick is to be straightforward and ask a partner what’s wrong and what could make lovemaking better.
“The answer can be frightening because she may express dissatisfaction, but this information can be essential to relationship growth,” Skyler writes. Whether a partner needs more emotional comfort or physical stimulation, communication is the key to unearthing these desires.
Once a couple is comfortable talking about their different needs, there doesn’t have to be such a stigma to discussing sex. After all, partners should be able to talk about sex with each other – otherwise, the trust that is so important to any relationship will be at risk.
Some couples may want to consider adding accessories to their sex life to spice things up. Having a LifeStyles™ vibrating ring or personal lubricant on hand in the boudoir can help make the night unforgettable.