No one wants to hear those four little words – “We need to talk.” While it’s not always the death kiss on a relationship, in many scenarios this short sentence can mean that your girlfriend is about to call it quits. It can take time to mend a broken heart, but there are some ways to speed up the recovery process.
Every breakup is unique, and sometimes there may be nothing you could have done to avoid what happened. Perhaps her feelings changed, or she has decided to move to a new location. In such cases, it can be painful (and pointless) to harp on what went wrong, since it’s out of your control. However, if your ex gave you some feedback during the breakup, try not to be overly defensive. Sure, it hurts to hear criticism, and maybe she didn’t say it in the most constructive way. Still, some time spent reflecting on changes you need to make could go a long way. If she called you a disgusting pig, it’s going to sting no matter what. But once you’ve calmed down, take a look at yourself – could you spend more time cleaning up your place? Do you make derogatory comments about others? If you can find a kernel of truth in her breakup reasoning, then it may help you land the perfect partner later on down the road. Change is a good thing!
Rally the troops
There’s no rulebook that says guy pals can’t lean on each other in times of need. Female friends are known, albeit stereotypically, to call on each other when someone suffers a breakup – and your guy friends can offer the same reassurance. OK, so maybe you don’t want to watch some romantic comedies and eat ice cream straight from the tub. But you can head out to a restaurant, drink a few beers, watch a fun movie or play a game of touch football. Spending time with your pals will help you focus on something else, and they’ll likely offer you reassurance that there are indeed more fish in the sea.
Lay off the social networks
In today’s technological world, even after a breakup, your ex can haunt you for a long time on the internet. Do your best to avoid the temptation to check in on your former flame through Facebook, Twitter or another website. It will only make getting over her more difficult. This may mean you need to temporarily deactivate your account. This may feel like a second breakup, but you’ll be thankful in a few months when you sign back on and see that you avoided viewing all of those pics of your ex having fun while you were on the mend.
Get back on that horse
After going through a rough split, you may just want to wallow around on your own, sniffling over photographs and wondering where you went wrong. There’s nothing wrong with mourning a past relationship, but if you spend too much time in the depths of despair, you run the risk of never recovering. Instead, get back on your horse and head out for a night on the town. Of course, you probably won’t meet someone who will help you get over your ex entirely, but having some fun with a new woman may be just the medicine you need. Just be sure to bring your condoms along – sexually transmitted infections can be just as painful as a broken heart.